My defining moment was definitely the moment I found out Tia Argentina passed away. There I was on stage introducing a performer. It was my third Lovemionline Glorious Sex Showcase but there was nothing glorious about the event. I had lost money. Not enough people attended or purchased drinks, which meant I lost a $400 bar deposit. Then I got the call, right before going back on stage. I remembered wanting to run to the hospital. I remember looking around at the small group of people who were gathered, the creative performers that I was helping to shine, and thinking: what am I doing with my life? My aunt had just lost hers after being comatose for three months, unable to express any angst, happiness, dreams, or pain. I didn’t want to live a life where I didn’t express my shine. I didn’t want to be silenced, pretending I was happy behind the scenes.
After the news, we went to the hospital. So many sorrowful tears were shed. Just typing this makes me cry. The next few days were the toughest I experienced but they made me stop bullshitting and making excuses. A week later I unplugged Lovemionline.com and canceled all future events. I decided to focus on me and hone my talents. I came from behind the scenes and am now shining as bright as the sun.