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My Sworn Enemy: The Queef

Sujeiry

My Sworn Enemy: The Queef

Unlike Catwoman, I am not a super villain. Yet, just like that pussy, I have a sworn enemy. My nemesis is none other than The Queef. She sneaks up on me in the most unfortunate moments, cackling at my embarrassment.

It’s been this way since we first met.

I was at a high school dance. After hours of pumping, swerving and holding in my bladder while doing The Butterfly, I ran to the bathroom. The Queef followed me in quietly. Unbeknownst to me and Sujeiry, she crept into my bathroom stall. Sujeiry pulled down her pants and set me free. I unclenched. And so did she.

“Prrrrr!”

Sujeiry looked down at me, puzzled.

“Did you just fart?” She asked.

I shook my pelitos from left to right.

“Pfffffft!”

“What is that?” I questioned, looking around. My clitoris had no idea. My hymen, on the other hand, squealed in terror, “The Queef!”

The Queef cackled like a maniacal villain. I knew she was trouble.

The next time The Queef appeared I was prepared to fight fire with fire. I learned that The Queef was literally hot air. She’s a pepa fart. And, like every super villain, I knew she had a weakness.

I lay in bed with Prince George. He was a tiny penis but still very enjoyable. He began to tickle me. I felt The Queef coming. Just when she was ready to rip, I tightened my muscles. She pushed harder. I clenched like my life depended on it. Soon, she retreated.

I was triumphant! I kegeled her to death!

Since then, The Queef hasn’t shown her smelly face.
Because though this pussy may not be a villain, I sure am super.

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Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of LoveSujeiry.com. She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto LoveSujeiry.com - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on Latina.com works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.

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