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Decisions, Decision: Living My Life For Myself

Sujeiry

Decisions, Decision: Living My Life For Myself

Decisions and DoubtsI have followed a certain pattern since I can’t remember. The pattern of living life for others and making decisions based on what others feel is best for me. Maybe it began when I was 12-years-old. That’s when Mami decided to move our entire family to Lawrence, MA because my sister was accepted to Phillips Academy Andover, one of the top 3 preparatory schools in the United States. We packed our bags and moved to Massachusetts, where I also attended Andover, mostly because my sister encouraged me to do so.

The next major decision of my life was also made for me. My sister graduated Wesleyan University and wanted to move back to New York City, where her boyfriend and friends were. I refused to leave MA, the only home I’d known for 10 years. I had grown accustomed to suburban life and had few comrades in NYC. But I didn’t fight. I graduated from the University of Massachusetts of Amherst and, instead of finding a job in Boston, where I wanted to remain, I went along with my sister and Mami’s plan.

And I’ve done so ever since.

I have remained in NYC mainly for them, because of them. I don’t want to hurt them or rock the boat by deviating from the course they have set for our family, for me.  But, lately, I have felt the desire and need to break free of the pattern. I am filled with angst and rebellion and long to make a life that is right for me…no matter whom I disappoint or leave behind in the process.

I am ready to make a change.

Now, I feel more focused than ever and super aware of who I am and the life that I want to live. I no longer want others to make decisions for me. I want to fight for what is rightfully mine…my life, my choice, my career, my body, my heart, my gut.

Today, I break this pattern, which was set in motion by my mother via my sister.

Today, I no longer peddle down a path that is not my own.

Today, I change my circumstances.

On this Motivation Monday, I look at where I’ve been and where I am going. I reflect and choose to stop spinning and creating cyclical patterns, living a life that is my own.

I am ready to make a change.

 

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Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of LoveSujeiry.com. She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto LoveSujeiry.com - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on Latina.com works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.

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