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Hacked: It’s Like Sleeping with a Guy When You Have Beer Goggles

Beer Goggles
Flickr: Genista.

The Single Life

Hacked: It’s Like Sleeping with a Guy When You Have Beer Goggles

So we were hacked and I felt like I drank too much and slept with a Turkish website terrorist.

You’re hanging out at a local bar, feeling fine and sipping on wine. And some vodka and maybe a little beer. You’re kind of plastered, but your stunning, yellow jumpsuit with a plunging neckline and open-toed Chinese Laundry heels are making you feel extra confident. You’re killin’ ’em, girl. And so you make eyes with the mysterious guy across the bar. You can’t really see him clearly, but you make up your mind: he is hot and I’m going to get some of that.

That’s what beer goggles do. They make someone look much more attractive and trusting than they really are.

PLUS: How a Cat Flying on a Plane Wing is a Metaphor for Dating

Still, you don’t know that. You’re drunk! You’re horny! You want that man even if he looks like a walrus at the zoo! Even if he’s giving you skeevy vibes after asking him what he does for a living and he responds, “Looking into you.” He will be yours! So, you seduce him, which doesn’t take long because he’s willing and eager to come to your place, and you have sex. You’re not sure how good the sex was because – beer goggles.

The next morning you wake up, exhausted with stinky breath and mascara stuck to your cheeks. And your mystery man is gone. So is your wallet. He’s stolen your credit cards and hacked into your life. You feel so violated. Damn you, beer goggles! Damn you, Turkish hackers!

Huh? Yes! Hackers! was compromised. We were fiddled and fondled by Turkish hackers this morning, and it felt like being bamboozled by a guy at a bar after having too much to drink. Some content was lost, and funny enough it was a post about a lost friendship, and how we must unfollow said former BFFs from social media. And poof, the post is gone. That’s symbolic, y’all. That’s a big reminder to let go.

PLUS: I Don’t Want to Let Go of Expectations in Relationships

Another the lesson here, ladies, is drink less, be aware and always pay attention to details. Don’t ignore your intuition if it’s telling you that you are not safe. I won’t. I will personally make sure that is always running smoothly so myself and my awesome writers continue to share love stories, worst dates, dating and sex tips, relationship content and advice videos. The next time a situation looks fishy I will warn my protector (my webhost), let go and strut away in my hot yellow jumpsuit.

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Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.


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