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This Sex Calculator Tells You How Much Sex to Have to Lose Weight

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This Sex Calculator Tells You How Much Sex to Have to Lose Weight

Photo: Alexandra Gorn.

This Sex Calculator Tells You How Much Sex to Have to Lose Weight

Discover how much sex to have to lose some lbs with your lover, lover.

The Universe has been shouting at me lately. It’s grabbing me by the ear like a pissed off mama and screaming, “Get in shape, gorda!” I know what you’re thinking; Sujeiry’s buggin’ cause she isn’t fat. Not on the outside, I’m what you call “skinny fat.” I’m a flaca with a high BMI even though the scale says otherwise.

I don’t work out and never have. Walking was once my form of exercise and I don’t do much of that since I began driving. And I feel the effects of sedentary living. At 40 years old, I wake up with a sore back, tight shoulders and my ass is getting flatter because of sitting so long while writing and working away at my computer.

Although I don’t look unhealthy, my body is craving some TLC in the form of calorie burning and (wait for it!) fruits and veggies. But don’t want any of that. So I’ll have sex instead.

say what now nene leakes

I know what you’re thinking; Sujeiry is buggin’ cause she thinks she can lose weight just by having sex. This Sex Workout Calculator will tell you otherwise. You can practically build a sex workout just by entering your weight and that of your lover and choosing specific sexual positions.


By their calculations, if I give a BJ for 5 minutes, do missionary for 10 minutes and reverse cowgirl for another 10, I will lose 60 calories, which is equal to 25 minutes of aerobics. (Who needs Zumba when ya got sex?!) So, to drop 5 lbs in a month, I’d basically have to have sex every day or do some kama surtra on Boo’s ass. If you see me flexing and stretching on social media, you know why. And it ain’t because I’m going to the gym.

Did you take the Sex Workout Calculator quiz? Share your findings in comments!

Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of LoveSujeiry.com. She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto LoveSujeiry.com - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on Latina.com works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.

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