Connect with us

What Men Think About the “90 Day” Sex Rule

What Men Think About the “90 Day” Sex Rule
Flickr: Catzrule

Ay Love!

What Men Think About the “90 Day” Sex Rule

Inside look at when men think about women who wait for sex, the rules and the “90 Day” sex rule. Do men respect women who have sex and give it up quickly?

by Lawrence Charles

In the history of humanity, more than a few great lies have been told to the population. We were told Bill Clinton did not have sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky. We were told Kim Kardashian’s backside was real. We were also told women should wait 90 days before giving a man the “red light special.” Well, my brethren, I am here today to inform you it is all a facade.

The 90-Day Sex Rule
I never subscribed to the idea women should wait a predetermined amount of time to have sex with a potential suitor. While some ladies might believe it’ll make a guy respect them, it’s not nearly as important as everyone would like to believe. I do understand the logic behind the so-called “90-Day Sex Rule.” No woman wants to look like a tramp. And yes, under some circumstances, a lady may look like she’s done this before if she gives it up on the first night. But there’s one aspect that overrides all of the rules and regulations: connection.

[ALSO READ: How to Revive Courtship (Response to NY Times “The End of Courtship?”)]

A Genuine Connection
When two people have a genuine connection rules get in the way of what could be a beautiful “situationship.” Now, I’m not insinuating women should lower their drawers after laughing about “Love and Hip Hop” over dinner. Just let the flow dictate when the time is right. Maybe it’s a week, maybe it’s a month, hell, maybe it’s a year. Both parties know when the stars are truly aligned.

Now, if a dude is just pressing you for sex, he’s not somebody you need to be dealing with anyway.

Sex and Respect
So, do men respect women who give it up quick? Most still do. Take my story. I had sex with a female shortly after meeting her. She actually grew up with one of my homegirls, so we knew a lot of people in the same circle. We hit it off that night, went out to dinner the next week and had sex shortly after the meal. I knew her for about seven days, clearly short of 90.

Did I judge her for it? Absolutely not. We had a great time that night and it just felt right. Nothing was forced and nothing was assumed beforehand. Although we didn’t work out, it wasn’t because of how soon we had sex. She was a few years older than me and completely focused on her career. I respected her wishes and kept it moving.

All in all, ladies, you’re not proving anything to us by waiting for a certain period of time. Those who say so are feeding you a bunch of tomfoolery. Just do what feels right and say no to unnecessary rules.

Tell us. What do you think of the “90-Day Sex Rule” or just waiting for sex? Share your thoughts!

Continue Reading

Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.


More in Ay Love!

Get Love In Your Inbox

Sign up for the Love Sujeiry newsletter and receive a free chapter of Dating RITE. Plus, stay in the know on all things love, including videos, articles, merch and events.
Email address
Secure and Spam free...






  • Honored to share a space in the podcast universe with
  • Leaving the city exhilarated after speaking on a panel of
  • TBT to jennypbautista spending time with me in Queens! So
  • Happy birthday Mami! I strive to be as supportive of
  • Happy Saturday! toddlermomlife parkfun toddlerboy happyson latinamom
  • No lie I can spend 4 hours in Marshalls
  • I believe that the way to live life is to
  • Evan you fill me with a love thats Godly So

Latina TV

To Top