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Should You Be Friends With An Ex?

Sujeiry Looks Into the Distance

Ay Love!

Should You Be Friends With An Ex?

Exes. They come. They go. And, sometimes, they come back. So, should we be friends with our exes or cut them off as soon as the sex in ex is no longer?

The smart move is to cut ties, especially if you are a woman who still longs for the one that got away. Every text or email leads to a fantazy about a potential reunion. If you miss his call, you return his call, hoping he’ll pick up, pick up, pick up! Then you wait. You flinch every time your phone beeps. Perhaps you give him a special ringtone just in case he calls while you’re in the shower. A sexy groove booms while you scrub your hair. You almost break your neck leaping out of the shower. With soap in your eyes, you run across the floor and snatch your phone from its chord.

But you missed it. He doesn’t leave a message and you missed the call and you wonder: should I call again?

There in lies the danger of playing this game. If still emotionally invested (which most of us still are after a breakup), the what ifs jumble our thoughts and we question our judgement and feelings. As we wait for their call, for that ex to come back, we begin to envision a new beginning with a love that should never have been or a relationship that has run its course. What if emotions aren’t an issue? Still, keep the ex at bay. They say people come into in our lives for a reason. Why would you drag on a relationship that served its purpose? You wouldn’t return to an old job if you already learned the required skills. You wouldn’t trip over the same rock in the middle of the road. You move on. You walk around the bump and begin a new journey.

So, leave your ex where he belongs. Out of your bed, far from your heart and no where near your phonebook. Chances are if he’s seen you naked he’ll try, try again. And that, my friends, is not a friendship.


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Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.


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