Sex is supposed to be a thrilling, toe-curling experience. It should begin with tongue licks and soft finger pokes that result in orgasm and end with a night of cuddling and pillow talk. For those who just want to get it in and get out, your behavior after sex can mean the difference between getting head butted or getting head…again. It all depends on how you play it and what you say after sex.
Twitter decided to pose this as a twitter trend, hoping to get some laughs and insight on what not to say after sex. Here are my Tweets for #dontsaythataftersex:
- Lets get married. #dontsaythataftersex
- Wait…did you cum? #dontsaythataftersex
- My ex didn’t have any complaints. #dontsaythataftersex
- That thing u did? It reminded me of (insert female name here)…#dontsaythataftersex
- It’s your fault you didn’t orgasm. #dontsaythataftersex
- What’s your name again? #dontsaythataftersex
- Wait, let me inspect your dick. #dontsaythataftersex
- What’s that smell? #dontsaythataftersex
- How much do I owe you? #dontsaythataftersex
- I just felt your sperm connect with my egg. #dontsaythataftersex
- Do we really have to dispose of your sperm? #dontsaythataftersex
So my sexy, Pepitas! Take note! Like my momma always says, if you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all, and that includes all pepa™ and pene talk. Besides, sex is supposed to be sexy not slimy or disrespectful. Remember that the next time you put on a condom, ride the wave, and face the Pepita or Pepito that is lying beside/on top of you.