I’ve had many boyfriends. Four to be exact, though one of the four I deny, deny, deny was ever anything but a fling. You would too if you spent six months listening to incessant talk about politics and Puerto Rican pride. Put the flag down, already. I get it! You love your bonita bandera.
The other three weren’t so bad. Elijah treated me like gold, until his ex-girlfriend returned and “confused” him. The next may have pretended to have Cancer to break up with me and reunite with the mother of his child. The last was Luke, who sought a “girlfriend” while I expected a partner. His Dominican pride also drove me nuts. Put the Visa down, already. I get it! You love Quisqueya so much you won’t retire anywhere else.
Another commonality among my exes, besides their lack of love for me and, of course, ME, was that neither was my friend on Facebook or a Twitter follower. Social media wasn’t part of our relationships. Even Luke, who had a Facebook profile, didn’t want to be my “friend.” Because he was hiding hundreds of female “friends” who cooed, “Ay Papi!” on his photos.
So, you can imagine my pleasant surprise when Paco was not only my “friend” on Facebook, but also began following me on Twitter. I hadn’t heard from him since our first date in Las Vegas. Paco didn’t call, text or contact me on FB chat. I let it go. I wasn’t forcing anyone to pursue me. Besides, our time in Vegas was plotted by my sister, Adriana.
“It was a ‘non date’,” I reminded myself to feel better.
Then he resurfaced when I tweeted the following:
He replied, “Harsh.”
We chatted some more about red flags. And the tweets continued the next day and days that followed. Soon, Paco and I had established a rapport over Twitter that was less friendship oriented and much more frisky. There were tweets about “slump busters” and droughts. There was also a sex-tweeting session.
You read that right. Sex-tweeting.
Paco and I didn’t get too dirty. At least, not as dirty as I know I can be and I assumed he could be. But there was a definite shift in our relationship. He very well may have liked me. We were flirting heavily over social media and he initiated a text or two during the course of our Twitter relationship. He even text me, “Happy birthday!” on the best day of the year – April 16!
What was next, I didn’t know. One thing was certain: he wasn’t Puerto Rican or addicted to Fidel Castro or the Dominican Republic. He wouldn’t lie about terminal illnesses. Paco was my “friend” on Facebook. Paco was my very first Twitter Boyfriend and I was excited about the potential.