When you’re heading off to college but still in a relationship, there’s sure to be drama. No matter how strong your relationship may be distance puts pressure on all relationships. It magnifies the weaknesses. There’s also conflict in trying to experience new things yet feeling a little held back. But not all is lost. If you feel this person is the one that you are meant to be with, there are steps to take to maintain a healthy relationship. Here is how your relationship can survive when going away for college.
1. Communication is vital. It is the only way a relationship can flourish. This isn’t just about talking to each other on a regular basis. It’s deeper than that. It involves actually listening to what your partner is expressing. You also have to be open enough to express yourself clearly so there are no misunderstandings. It is so easy to have miscommunication, especially since you don’t always have the option to communicate face to face. That’s why taking that time to talk is vital. Also, make sure to use FaceTime or Skype when having important discussions regarding your relationship.
2. Give space without taking it personal. While away at college, you will find yourself overwhelmed with the workload. If your partner is also attending college, you will both encounter this. It is extremely difficult to have a consistent conversation during, let’s say, finals week. So keep this in mind. Try not to take it personal. It’s important to give him the space he needs to get the work done, and vice versa. Occasional visits to his campus are okay, but I wouldn’t recommend showing up for a visit every other day or unannounced.
3. Have patience. Being patient is a good virtue, even if it’s not one we see in this day and age. Most people need an immediate response and that isn’t always an option. If you can learn to be patient with your partner, it will be easier to deal with the distance. Take the relationship one day at a time. They’ll be home for break before you know it!
4. Be understanding. Understand that college isn’t high school anymore. When you do, you’ll adapt to the new and exciting opportunities that are coming along. You and your love are living different lives now. Although you may not be as intertwined as you were in high school, it’s important that you both experience this new life they you are living. Also, remember and understand that not seeing your significant other on a regular basis doesn’t mean they love you less.
Erynn Castellanos is an aspiring radio broadcaster with an opinion on all things love. Currently going through the trials of most twenty somethings, she balances life and relationships and knows what she wants. Her articles on LoveSujeiry.com tie in her personal experiences while exploring the early stages of dating and the single life.
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