I broke down. At 2AM, I literally began sobbing at a lounge because of Mr. G. He didn’t do anything, and that was the problem. Not to mention I felt lost and incredibly alone after the speeddating and singles mixer debacle. So from one minute to the next I go from swaying to a house song to sitting in a bathroom stall, blowing my runny nose. And then I did something I haven’t done since my days as a foolish and impulsive twenty-something year old. I wiped away the last of my tears, grabbed my cell and began drinking and texting.
“This is as real as I can get,” I typed. “I feel you are my soulmate. You read my stories & it was clear. I am tired of waiting. I am tired of words. If you are serious about you & I then SHOW ME.”
I reread the text quickly and pressed ‘Send’ without hesitation. Funny enough, I immediately felt better. Suppressing those honest yet intense words were obviously weighing down my spirit. My sudden indifference was also surprising. At that moment, I didn’t really care if Mr. G replied or not. I didn’t expect anything from him anymore and assumed my words would scare him half to death anyway. Mr. G was probably stocking up his man cave minutes after receiving the text. He was probably going into hiding, never to be heard from again. And then he did what he always does. He proved me wrong, once again. The next day I received his good morning text and wondered what to do next.