Today’s society puts so much emphasis on labels. If you aren’t Facebook official, the relationship isn’t actually real. If he doesn’t introduce you as his “girlfriend,” you freak out and don’t know “what you are.” Many times women don’t know where they stand with a guy. You think: I’m in a WTF with so and so!
My WTF purgatory lasted for months. I was confused. I was always afraid to ask my guy what was going on because I did not want him to tell me that he only liked me as a friend. However, being direct is key. If you notice any of the signs below, you’re guy wants a relationship that’s more than casual.
You see each other every day. If you see your guy every single day, your relationship is no longer casual. In my situation it started to become abnormal if I didn’t see him. I actually missed his company when he wasn’t around.
Sharing meals together. I caught myself buying his favorite foods when grocery shopping. How did I know what he liked? He was at my house every night for dinner. Suddenly, I wanted nothing to do with GMOs and my food had to be organic. All of my meat was fresh from the farmer’s market. We stood in my kitchen and made dinner together often. We talked about our days. This is not “casual relationship” behavior.
Texting all day every day. I was the first to leave in the morning, so I would text him to make sure he woke up and was off to work on time. Yes, he was sleeping over on a daily basis. He let me know that he was awake and later in the day would text to see how my day was going. Again, this is what happens when you are in a relationship.
Talking about the future. I have always wanted to move out west, and I told him that once my daughter went to college I planned to do so. Suddenly, he mentioned that we could probably find a cheap home in a certain part of Nevada and live a very simple life. Um, wait, who invited him? That would be an extreme commitment on his part.
Saying that four-letter word. My maybe-boyfriend would call me in a drunken state when out at a bar with his friends. I could hear the girls in the background, he would then tell me he’d call me the next day. That’s when I began texting like a psychotic girlfriend; my texts went unanswered. This was followed by his 2 a.m. phone call, which I ignored. An hour later, I called him crying, asking him who the girls were. “Don’t you know I love you, I don’t want anyone else,” he replied. Our relationship status was then confirmed.
I wish I could tell you that my story had a happy ending. Sadly, he decided that he didn’t want this after all. I miss my best friend and the person I loved, but if I had never given us a chance I never would have known. If you think there is something between you and your guy, go for it. If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no.