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Confession of a Female Player: How to Play a Man Like A Man

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Confession of a Female Player: How to Play a Man Like A Man

Ever want to juggle men? Tabitha shares her story on how to be a playa.

Whether you’re a smoker, heavy drinker or emotional eater, everyone has a habit they would like to quit. Mine just happened to be men.

I didn’t set out to be player. I grew up in a small town outside of Philly. I had my first and only child three days after my 19th birthday. My relationship failed and I was forced to support myself and my baby. I have always been overly ambitious so I quickly worked my way from a customer service job to sales. After about two years I was asked to travel for work. That’s when my life changed. The entire world opened up in front of me.

PLUS: Why I’m Slowing Down Professionally

One week per month I traveled to various major cities: Los Angeles, San Diego, Chicago, Atlanta, Houston, Washington and D.C., just to name a few. I was staying in beautiful hotels and meeting many successful men. America became a buffet of men – all cultures, races and backgrounds. The thing with being a woman on the road is you don’t even have to be beautiful. What carries you through is charm, intelligence and a sense of humor.

Meeting men on the road also boosted my confidence. I was no longer the small town girl that got pregnant in high school. No one knew me. I even developed techniques to meet men and become a true player. Here’s how you can to.

Contact info for “business purposes.”

I attended a lot of conferences; it was my job to talk. I probably spoke to over 100 people per day as these events averaged 30,000 attendees. During the course of my day I got around three personal contacts. Multiply that by four days. That’s 12 new numbers per month on average!

How did I keep track of all these new men? I would program them on my phone by first name and either the state or country they lived in. If they were extremely hot, I would add the number 1 next to it or some other identifying tip. This would move them up in line if they wanted dinner or drinks during the business trip.

Become the Queen of Multitasking.

I was a master juggler of men. However, not all men were men of quality. So I factored in their looks, level of education and the potential of seeing them again if I did like them.

My evening would work like this: drinks with the average guy directly after meeting , dinner with the winner and then drinks with another guy who was just so-so. But only if dinner with the high-quality guy ended sooner than I had hoped. That’s three dates in one night. I told you I was a player.

Lie, lie, and lie some more. 

What if these men found out about my super packed date nights? Simple. I’d tell them I had a business meeting and that the other guy was a client. Yes, I lied constantly. I told every single man that I had “never done this before.” No one wants to think the girl they just met is a fucking piranha. My rational: men do it every single day.

Make the men feel like a million bucks.

And I mean all of them! Each guy I spent time with felt special even though some were more special than others. I made plans with them while on other trips. Some men I never saw again.

About the sex…

For me, being a player was never about the sex. It was about the attention and the surge of power that I felt when I had control over the CEO of a company or some other top-level executive. Being a female player is glamorous. You get free drinks, dinner, and sometimes even shopping sprees. It’s walking into the fanciest of restaurants with the CEO of a company on your arm, knowing damn well you don’t belong but pretending to anyway.

MORE: Confessions of a Popcorn Player: I’m On a Dating Hiatus

But, everything has a cost. I lost the love of my life because I was addicted to this thrill. I was addicted to all of the attention, the money and power. Now, I am completely reformed. I still travel but I am in my room by 9 p.m. What I desire has changed. Now, I want a man to wait for me when my plane touches down in Philly. Sometimes I wonder if karma has reared its ugly head. Maybe that’s why I am still single and go to sleep alone at night.

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Tabitha Bauman

Living in the suburbs of Philadelphia, Tabitha is a self-proclaimed free spirit who travels extensively throughout the USA. She has a bold writing style and offers her insight on love, dating and relationships on LoveSujeiry.com and TheDatingMix.com. She writers from her own experience as an independent woman exposed to the world of modern-day dating. Her goal is to enable women to value themselves above all else and find happiness in this great big world.

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