A man tells you he wants to be with you. That he has never felt this strongly for anyone else. You are everything he’s ever hoped for, and he can’t imagine his life without you. But he hardly calls or texts or spends any time with you. What gives, right? Is it cowardice, laziness, timing or what?
As a man, I’m here to get honest about those guys who are all talk but no action. First, ask yourself these questions:
Does he have the kind of job that keeps him away for days, weeks, or even months at a time? Does he have kids from a previous relationship? Does he go to college and work as well? What kind of person is he? A solitary type? A socialite? A workaholic?
If you answered yes to all or most of the questions above, he is probably not relationship ready. But this is not on you. A man that enters a relationship with so much going on (or sometimes going wrong) should have disclosed his situation. If he’s never opened up about why he’s full of false promises, it behooves you to ask him what’s going on.
Also, your man could be so consumed with life and work that he may just want an LAT (Living Apart Together) relationship. This is an intimate relationship where you spend most of your time separately rather than as a couple. Some heavily career minded men prefer this type of relationship as they are soley focused on reaching their career or educational goals. So, why not break up with you? Men like this do want a stable relationship; they just can’t give you what you need at the time. And they don’t want to let you go in case they lose you. So all talk and no action it is then.
On the contrary, if your man isn’t super busy and his career and life are on track, he may be all talk and no action because:
- He might be with another woman (or other women).
- He is not as in love with you as he says he is.
- He just wants someone there because he doesn’t want to be single or alone.
- He likes the benefits of having a girl when he wants to be present, but doesn’t want to commit 100 percent.
- He’s trying to push you away so you break up with him. Yes, it happens. Yes, he’s a coward.
The best solution: communicate openly. Talk to him face to face. If you hardly see him, text him that you’re done. If he truly cares, he’ll show up to talk it out. And when he does, put your foot down. Demand that things change, or your relationship is over. If there is no consistent change over time (he needs to show you he’s not just shaping up for a week or two), it’s time to walk away.
However, if you’re not in love, ladies, please don’t waste your precious time. Don’t even bother associating with him after the third, fourth, fifth time he doesn’t show up or “forgets” to call you back. Find the next brother that will give you the time of day and give you the relationship and attention that you so rightfully deserve.