When I was a Freshman in high school, I asked my friend Christina how to flirt. It was during our instructional volleyball class. We ran around the track, huffing and puffing and chatting as we often did, and on our 3rd or 4th lap I dropped this monumental question. At least that’s how I felt at the time. You see, at 14 years old, I had yet to kiss a boy. Christina, on the other hand, had. She had a boyfriend and everything! And so I held her in high esteem when it came to matters of the heart; Christina was my very own Buddha.
So what did my wise one reply? Flirting comes naturally. I shook my head, confused and disappointed in her answer. Not a bone in my body felt naturally flirtatious or sexy for that matter. You have to be confident, my red headed Buddha continued. I frowned, realizing I was in trouble. Christina tried to reassure me and continued to give me pointers throughout our run. But by our tenth and final lap, I had silently resigned to a life without flirting and romantic love.
I eventually did learn how to flirt. Once I found the confidence Christina spoke of and became comfortable in my own skin, I learned how to work a room, my pepa™, and a man, naturally. I also realized that I had the wrong idea about flirting. There is no one or right way. As a matter a fact, a research conducted showed that there are 5 types of flirts. These include physical flirts, traditional flirts, polite flirts, sincere flirts, and playful flirts.
- A physical flirt won’t necessarily smack that ass but they will do a lot of touching. I fall in this category. So when you see me rubbing my hands over a mans bicep, chest, or (ahum) neither region, consider me flirting. The study also shows that physical flirts develop relationships quickly, have greater sexual chemistry, and a deeper emotional connection to their significant other. Guilty as charged!
- The traditional flirt is quiet the opposite of the physical flirt. Traditional flirts live in the olden ages, read The Rules of Marriage while eating grapes, and have their pepas™ locked in a chastity belt. No, they actually just believe men should initiate. Pursuing is a big no-no for traditional flirts which is why these women have trouble getting men’s attention. Men who are traditional flirts also have trouble approaching women. So if you see an introverted man who keeps giving you the eye but doesn’t make a move, he’s a traditional flirt. That’s when the physical flirt would come in and grab his balls!
- The next flirt is the polite flirt, who is all about manners and etiquette. You may spend the day sipping tea and eating crumpets because she will not use sex (nonverbal or otherwise) to get your attention. They also aren’t impressed by flirting and will not initiate, just like a traditional flirt.
- The sincere flirt is just that: sincere. They are honest when they flirt. They express themselves well and usually have relationships with strong emotional connections and sexual chemistry. Like the polite flirt, their relationships are also meaningful. I can just see a sincere flirt crying on the beach while playing the guitar and watching the sunset ala Brendan Fraser in Bedazzled.
- The playful flirt is nothing like Brendan’s character who just wants to be loved. Playful flirts just want to have fun! They flirt to boost their self-esteem and are easy to spot. I’m talking to you guy at Coogans who’s talking to every girl at the bar. Basically, playful flirts are players. And that’s when my physical flirtation turns violent.
So there you have it! The 5 types of flirts. Regardless of what this list says, I believe my read headed, Puerto Rican/French Canadian Buddah got it right at 14. Know yourself and you’ll be the best damn flirt that you’re meant to be. While you’re on your journey, I’ll be working on perfecting my physical flirtation skills. Oh boyfriend, you better watch out!
Leave a comment below and tell us which type of flirt you think you are!