Online Dating After 40 Doesn't Work That Way | And Just Like That Recap

And Just Like That…Carrie Misrepresents Online Dating

I have some beef with And Just Like That. So much so that I ran to my computer after stuffing my mouth with six gingerbread cookies to write an open letter instead of a recap. 

I begin with, “How dare you?!” How dare you portray online dating after 40 in such a manner? And I’m not speaking about the (SPOILER ALERT!) throw up scene between Robert and Carrie. I’m sure many women over the age of 40 have been doused with puke after a date with a 40-something-year old man because he’s had too much to drink. Or maybe you’re a woman in your 40s that’s now a cougar. That’s what you get for dating boys in their 20s that still drink cheap liquor. Absolut Vodka, anyone? 

The Reality of Online Dating After 40

I’m referring to how quickly Carrie Bradshaw connected with a man on an online dating app. She went on an actual date in 2.2 seconds. Excuse me? I have some questions. 

I’ve spoken to many single women and they’ve all relayed the same message: online dating after 40 is the pits. You don’t just get on a dating app and meet a cutie patootie that’s sweet and professional. Nooooooo! This is what online dating after 40 actually looks like. (Hold your husbands, married women!)

Scenario 1

You swipe right. He swipes right. He initiates conversation over chat. And you chat for days and sometimes weeks before he asks for your phone number. If he asks for your number, you chat some more. And by chat, I mean texts. Maybe he’ll throw you a bone and Facetime you. And after you’re at your wits end, wondering if this mofo only wants to be your Pen Pal, he asks you out on a date.

ALSO READ: Beware of These Online Dating Scam

Scenario 2

The situation can get worse. So much worse. Because sometimes, after chatting and texting and hoping to meet in person, he ghosts you. And you feel like you just wasted your damn time yet again. But, just like Carrie Bradshaw’s editor said in And Just Like That’s “Sex and the Widow,” we gotta keep hope alive. So, when a new guy swipes right, we swipe left. Because it gives us a glimmer of hope that online dating after 40 will amount to more than just random phone numbers in our Contacts. 

Don’t get me wrong, I loved this episode of And Just Like That. It had the same pace as Sex and the City and Anthony’s one-liners killed me. Carrie felt light and Charlotte was Charlotte. And Miranda? Well, she tried to get it on with Steve in the kitchen, but he’s rusty and forgot how to finger bang. He asks Miranda if he should get the lube because he assumes her vaginal dryness has to do with being in her 50s. (Menopause, anyone?) Psst. Steve. She’s dry cause you ain’t Chey. 

PLUS: 8 Ways to Spice Up Your Sex Life

And just like that, Miranda is lying in bed with Chey Diaz who’s sucking on her nipples like a pacifier and I’m thinking, can they show this on TV? 

That’s more action than I’ve seen in years. Because I’m a 40 something year old woman who’s been single since 2018. One that wishes she could meet a man online just like that, throw up on my heels and everything.  

About Author /

Sujeiry Gonzalez (Love Sujeiry) is a Digital Publisher, Author, Connector, and Self-Love Advocate. Founder of, her mission is to provide expert resources and insightful and relatable content that guides Latinx women to love and embrace their authentic selves. Her writing has been published in Hip Latina, Well + Good, Madamenoire, Latina, YourTango. She also hosted her own radio show on SiriusXM (LoveSujeiry). Currently, Sujeiry resides on Long Island with her son, Evan, enjoying all things astrology (Aries sun, Capi rising!), hosting (she throws a mean party), and karaoke (she’s always Riri).

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