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THE LATINA SEX AND THE CITY
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In today’s world of dating, you can consider yourself lucky if a man responds to a text, and even luckier if he communicates his true feelings. “I hit the jackpot this time,” I share with friends confidently, “no doubt, this guy actually likes me!” Then, days go by without a word. And I mean zip, zero, nada – not even a smoke signal. On day five, when I’ve placed homeboy in my “eff you for life” list, he reappears like a lost puppy, if puppies could text. “Wanna meet up for lunch?” it reads. And as I choose between cursing him out or jumping for joy because, OMG! he likes me again, I wonder: what’s up with these mixed signals from guys?
I put on my detective hat and got to the bottom of this common dilemma. A few men broke their silence to share their reasoning behind mixed signals from guys. You’re welcome.
That’s according to Shawn Delgado, 40, from Charlotte. What happens is that when men don’t clarify their intentions women interpret that lack of clarity as a mixed signal. Jason White, 27 from St. Louis, wholeheartedly agrees with Shawn, stating that the receiving party (us) adds their desired interpretation. So, ladies, apparently, it’s all of our faults! Sure, buddy.
If a man gives a woman mixed signals, she can’t hold him accountable due to a lack of clarity. And that, according to Booker T, 46, from Atlanta, is why men give mixed signals. It’s a diversion tactic, y’all! We can’t hold a man to anything (especially a commitment) if he hasn’t stated what he wants and his actions remain inconsistent. It’s a way to taper our expectations. When they (our expectations) go high, men that give mixed signals bring them down low! Ugh.
And the most obvious reason why mixed signals exist: he’s just not that into you. “He doesn’t really want you or he’s really not available to pursue you,” stated Dominic Robinson, 39, from Memphis. So why does he keep coming around, you ask? You may be his backup or as he may just like your sex.
So, what have we learned today? If a man is indecisive, inconsistent, or hot and cold, it’s time to get off the roller coaster ride. Simply put, move the fuck on!
Written by Jeanine Cruz