Oh, wait. Wrong genre and Sarah Michelle Gellar reference.
Regardless, my fascination with Ryan Phillippe must now come to an end. His taste in women is lackluster and his decision making skills are that of a frat boy, especially after he and Reese Witherspoon divorced. Since his failed nuptials, he’s been with Abbie Cornish, whom was allegedly the reason for his split with Reese, hooked up with Rihanna (I just can’t get past the Ronald McDonald wig), is dating Amanda Seyfried, and now he impregnated up Alexis Knapp?
Who in the hell is Alexis Knapp?!
Recent reports have surfaced that Lips dated model-actress Alexis before Amanda and knocked her up. The affair between them “lasted a while” and now she’s in her second trimester, growing a hot baby with enough lips to make those with tiny lips (me!) resentful and jealous. Ryan hasn’t confirmed or denied but sources state he will get a DNA test. This would be Lips’ third child if (in my best Maury Povich voice) HE IS THE FATHER!!!
So I wave farewell to Ryan’s lips and move on to hunt for a man with lips to match. Because I can’t have a baby with a man who’s paying tripple the child support. No matter how sexy Lips may be my lips say, “No!”
And that’s both my mouth’s lips and my pepas™ lips.