Last night, I was glued to my television screen, live tweeting the epic event that is Juan Pablo on The Bachelor. It is Juan-uary, after all. I couldn’t pass up the show and relish in the beauty and charm of the first Latino bachelor. I want Juan Pablo to find love!
Wait. We all know that The Bachelor isn’t about finding love. Contrary to Chris Harrison’s instance, most bachelors on The Bachelor do not get married. They get attention, maybe some booty and lots of smooches, but they don’t always put a ring on it. If they do, they seldom walk down the aisle. I don’t believe you, Chris!
I love how Chris Harrison still believes #TheBachelor creates marriages.
— Sujeiry (@LoveSujeiry) January 7, 2014
The Bachelor is really about the women who come on to cat fight and profess their undying love to a man they’ve mostly hung out with on group dates. These women make The Bachelor worth watching. And I have a few favorites already. These are the women of this season of The Bachelor who are bringing drama, love and waterworks to the yard!
Lucy, who is a professional Free Spirit.
That’s really what her tagline said on the bottom of her name. Her career is “Free Spirit,” y’all! She rushed out of the limo and into Juan Pablo’s arms…barefoot. During their one on one time, she almost devoured him with her wild, wild ways. I can’t wait for Juan Pablo and Lucy to frolic in the mountains and hug trees. Yes, she made the first cut.
Andi, who is a gorgeous, kickass Assistant DA.
I am betting on her to to go the end. She is smart, sexy and seems like she’s very mature. And she can read! A lot. Juan Pablo seemed so shocked that she…can…read.
Amy J, the loony Massage Therapist.
When a man feels uncomfortable when you’re giving him a massage and you’re a professional massage therapist, he just isn’t that into you. Amy J. gave us loony eyes through her intro tape and kept the train going when she met Juan Pablo. I was scared for him. Apparently, he felt the fear cause he sent her packing.
Sharleen, the Opera Singer who isn’t that into it.
Sharleen got the first impression rose, and it makes sense. She’s gorgeous, intelligent, mature, and her dress was beautiful. Not to mention the fact that she wasn’t showing much interest in Juan Pablo. Before receiving the rose, she wondered if she should be on the show at all. As she said, it all felt “forced.” But he gave her a rose! Cause men seem to love women who are a bit aloof. She accepted the rose after all. I see Sharleen’s internal battle continuing throughout the season.
Lauren H, who was abandoned by her ex-fiancé.
Poor Lauren H. I should just call her The Cryer. She cried the whole damn episode. Because she wasn’t getting one-on-one time with Juan Pablo! Because she’s never been in this position! Because her fiance whom she lived with and was a stepmom to his son abandoned her months ago? Why are you on a reality show?! And she was booted.
Chelsea, who wants all babies.
Seriously. She wants, like, all of them! That’s what she told Juan Pablo when he asked, “How many kids do you want?” She made the cut.
Chantel, you stay!
The Bachelor got ethnic this year with a Latino bachelor and some women of color as contestants. I just wish her name wasn’t Chantel. She did make the first cut. Unlike in horror movies, the brown-skinned girl wasn’t killed off in the first five minutes! Hooray!