Calling all blonde, big breasted ladies! There is a hot piece of meat on the market with your names on it! He is filthy rich. He is famous. He is the phenomenon that is Hugh Hefner! Sure, he’s 85 years old. But he owns Playboy! You can have your own nekkid pictorial like Kendra Wilkinson, Bridget Marquardt, and Holly Madison. You can date other men while living in luxury. You’ll have to rub him with Vivaporu, feed him his daily Viagra, and give your pepa™ to his shriveled pene, but it’s worth it to swim in The Grotto!
Wait? Wasn’t Hugh Hefner engaged? Yes. Hugh was about to marry 24-year-old Crystal Harris just this Saturday. According to reports, she called off the wedding after they got into an argument over the phone.
Let me guess. She was tired of feeding him soup and playing Yahtzee?
Hugh has since denied the argument but did admit the wedding is off and that Harris moved out of the mansion. He just tweeted the following to his followers:
Ok…put down your lucite heels and tuck in your boobs, gold diggers! Hugh Hefner is receiving the love and support of Kimberly Conrad, his ex and only wife, and the mother of child. But keep an eye out. I’m sure you’re day will come!
I’m talking to you Holly Madison!