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Ask Sujeiry: Choosing Between Two Men


Ask Sujeiry: Choosing Between Two Men

Dear Sujeiry,

I was going out with this guy in high school and then I broke up with him because he was going nowhere quick. I started dating this other guy who also had no job. Now while dating the second guy I still had feelings for the first guy. I never stopped loving the first guy. Now I am confused because both guys want to be with me. And I really want to be with the first guy. My mom told me that I should just be with the first guy because she likes. She said that i just felt sympathy for the second guy. I don’t know what to do. I want to be with both of them but I know that is not possible. Any advice?

Choosing Between Two Men
24, Homestead, FL

Dear Choosing Between Two Men,

This is the first time a person has emailed me with this sort of dilemma, and what a dilemma it is! (Can you sense my sarcasm?)

Seriously mujer, your choice is pretty obvious. But since you’ve come to me for help I’m going to do what I do. Lets break down these two men, shall we?

  • Ambition: Guy 1 is “going nowhere quick”. Guy 2 is currently unemployed. That’s the same so they cancel each other out.
  • Age/Maturity: You didn’t give me any information so the score remains Guy 1 : 0, Guy 2: 0.
  • Familiarity: You dated Guy 1 in high school and, since you’re currently 24, I can only assume that you’ve known each other 6-10 years. That’s 6-10 years to build a connection. You met Guy 2 after Guy 1. Perhaps even just last month! So Guy 1 wins this round, putting the score at Guy 1: 1, Guy 2: 0.
  • Love: Love is the biggie and should truly be what drives your choice. You love Guy 1. You state clearly in your question that you still have feelings for him, pine for him…the whole shabang! Guy 2 not so much. Even your momma sees your lack of emotion for ese hombre!  Again, Guy 1 wins!

Any way I spin it, Guy 1 remains victorious. So stop being silly and choose the man you love and desire. And if you need any more convincing here’s the final score:

Love: ∞

Love strongly and wisely,
Sujeiry 1st Lady of Love

Have a relationship question? Contact Sujeiry for help! Please note: Identities will remain confidential.

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Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.


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