When I began dating (cue vieja voice) we had The Brick. The first cell phone cost $4000, was featured on Saved by the Bell and didn’t have a texting function.
You know what that means? I wasn’t texting and dating. That didn’t mean dating was easy; I was still trying to figure men (and myself) out often times with a Bacardi and Coke in hand (sometimes I double fisted). And people still ghosted, cheated and lied. But texting has definitely complicated dating.
Back in my day (cue vieja music) men would pick up the phone to speak with you and get to know you. Now, men text you (and often text multiple women at the same time) “sup” so you can come over to Netflix and Chill.
Back in my day (cue vieja music) men had to meet you on time. They didn’t have a cell to text “running late” or “omw.” They had to be there at 8pm if they said 8pm, or cut off their ear like Picasso because they had to use a payphone to leave a voice message on your answering machine!
So yes, dating was easier sans texting. Still, you can survive and date rite in these modern times. Need help? I got chu.
Ask that your interest calls you. If you really want a man to stop texting you, tell him to stop texting you. Simple enough, right? Right. But what if he doesn’t want to? you ask in a panic. He just ain’t that into you.
Trust me, if a man wants to get to know you and continue to date you, he’ll try to make you happy. Boo did with me. He hates talking on the phone but when I told him it was important to me to speak with him over the phone so we could get to know each other, he picked up that damn phone.
Don’t have a long ass text convo. You text him and ask about his day. Cool. That’s a nice thing to do. He answers, “Good. U?” Stop right there. Because what usually comes next is a long-winded answer about what happened at work and what you had for lunch and what you’re planning to do after work. Keep texts short. Don’t write out a chapter of your novel. If you have something to tell your interest, make a phone date or plan to meet him or her later that night.
Sext a little. Despite the trouble with texting and dating, there are some benefits. Like, you can sext to keep the spark alive. You can check in when you’re thinking of your interest or partner. And you can send cute gifs to express your funniest thoughts. That’s what makes texting fun!
Put your cell phone down. I know, it’s haaaaaaaaaaard! Whether you’re on a first date or a date with a potential boyfriend, you should give him or her your undivided attention. No ifs, ands or buts.
And of course, lead by example. Just like I had to stop chugging Bacardi and Cokes on dates, you have to stop complaining about texting and dating, how men suck and how you’ll never find “the one.” If you feel dating sucks, you won’t attract partners that will give you what you want and need. In fact, may not attract anyone at all. So quit your whining and get my ebook, Dating RITE to help you date and text in this modern age. Pretend you’re a vieja like I am and leave the texting to the youngin’s.