Connect with us

Ask Sujeiry: Should I Tell A Friend Her Man Is Cheating?


Ask Sujeiry: Should I Tell A Friend Her Man Is Cheating?

If you tell her, she may not believe you. If you don’t, she’ll be hurt. What to do?

Dear Sujeiry,

I jumped on the online dating bandwagon after my friend met this amazing guy. They’ve been dating for 5 months now and are head over heels about each other. They even met each others families.

Amazing, right? So it seems. Cause why does he show up as one of my “matches” on a dating app? I triple checked his profile and it’s him. It also says that he replies to messages “frequently” and logs on all the time! This puts me in such a terrible position. Should I tell my friend? I would want to know, but I don’t know if she will just ignore it. She’s so in love with him. Should I say something to him or just leave it alone? What’s your advice? 


A Good Friend


Dear A Good Friend,

Unfortunately, this is a common occurrence. I was once in your friends position and I tell the tale in my book, Love Trips: A Collection of Relationship Stumbles. Basically, my boyfriend at the time was also active online and my sister told me about his profile. Of course, I was distraught. It opened up more than a can of worms between me and my man, and a lot of my personal issues. So, yes, you’re friend is going to be devastated.

I have also been in your position. And having to tell a friend her boyfriend is possibly cheating (I say possibly because other than the profile, there’s no proof, which will make it even harder for her to believe) sucks. I told my friend, and though it did bite me in the ass (she didn’t believe me and stayed with him), I don’t regret being honest. I did my job as her friend – that’s to protect her and follow girl code.

My advice? Tell your friend. She will probably do what she wants with the information, but at least she knows what’s what and there are no secrets between you.

Again, your job as her friend is to protect her. Her boyfriend may be actively seeking other women online and putting her in harms way. From late night phone calls from other women to STDs, this can get dramatic. So tell her. But first, get proof. Screen capture his dating profile and activity in case she refuses to believe you. This also serves as proof if she confronts him, especially if he deletes his profile before you spill the beans.

As for telling him what you found, don’t. He’s a sneak, that guy, and you don’t owe him anything. Your duty is to her.

PLUS: New Dating App Filter Freckles, Booty Size and More

Just remember: proof or no proof, she may not believe you. She may not end the relationship. No matter what happens find solace in the fact that you are a good friend.

Love strongly and wisely,


[wd_contact_form id=”10″]

DISCLAIMER: The advice offered by Sujeiry Gonzalez are solely the opinion of Sujeiry Gonzalez and should not be considered as a form of therapy and/or diagnosis or treatment of any kind. If counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.

Continue Reading

Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.


More in Advice

Get Love In Your Inbox

Sign up for the Love Sujeiry newsletter and receive a free chapter of Dating RITE. Plus, stay in the know on all things love, including videos, articles, merch and events.
Email address
Secure and Spam free...






  • Another podcast recorded for July! The ladies of elsalonchronicles and
  • Its a bday weekend wrap! Great time today at Evans
  • Happy birthday baby! Youre not a baby anymore because today
  • Oh happy day! When God places passion in your heart
  • A belated Fathers Day to my baby daddy Yea I
  • My face when dishing on relationships mommyhood and living an
  • I caught Evan midwalk this morning The kid loves the
  • Smiling right now although I woke up feeling super down

Latina TV

To Top