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Ask Sujeiry: I Kissed Another Guy. Is That Cheating?



Ask Sujeiry: I Kissed Another Guy. Is That Cheating?

A woman asks for relationship advice after kissing another man though she’s in a relationship. Is it cheating? Should she tell her boyfriend?

cheaterWhat constitutes cheating depends on the couple.

Dear Sujeiry,

I’ve been in a relationship for two years and recently slipped up. I went to my best friend’s birthday party and kissed another guy. I was really drunk. It just happened when we were dancing.

I feel awful but I don’t know it this is really cheating. Is it? Should I tell my boyfriend? I’m never going to see the guy I kissed again and I won’t do it again. What should I do?


Kiss and Tell?


Dear Kiss and Tell?

You got yourself in trouble. You made a mistake and you seem remorseful. Did you cheat when you rubbed up on a man on the dance floor and kissed him? It all depends on your idea of cheating.

For me, cheating can happen in a number of ways. There’s emotional cheating, where someone is having an emotional relationship and feeling feelings for another. There is sex as cheating, whether it’s a one-time thing and/or a full-blown affair. There’s a mix of all. And, yes, kissing someone other than your man can constitute as cheating. At least for me.

[ALSO READ: Women Are Cheating As Much As Men Are and Here’s Why]

Question is: what did you and your guy decide is the meaning of cheating? What is inappropriate behavior? From the duress in your email, it may be that you haven’t discussed the parameters, so you don’t have these answers. Or you do know you messed up but you’re hoping that I tell you differently.

Should you tell him? I believe in treating those as you want to be treated. I would want to know therefore I would tell; for others, ignorance is bliss. Regardless, you must have a conversation with your guy about the issues in your relationship. You kissed another guy. A person in a relationship doesn’t kiss someone else “by accident.” You wanted to and so you did. Don’t blame it on the alcohol. Take responsibility and realize that these are signs that you are unhappy in your relationship, and possibly with yourself.

Love strongly and wisely,


Have a relationship question for Sujeiry? Go to the contact page and Ask Sujeiry!

Photo Credit: Datingish.

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Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.


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