Connect with us

Ask Sujeiry: How Do I Win Back The Father of My Child?

Mother and Baby

Advice

Ask Sujeiry: How Do I Win Back The Father of My Child?

Dear Sujeiry,

I’ve been dealing with my child’s father for years. It was mainly sexual but he has always been in my life.  He has a girlfriend now and says he loves her but he’s always around me and my child. It’s as if we were a family. He also tells me his personal problems but says he doesn’t have feelings for me.

I want to change things up – make him want me again and take things further this time. I don’t know how to go about it. Can you give me some advice on what to do?

Sincerely,

More Than A Baby Daddy

Dear More Than A Baby Daddy,

I’m going to hit you with my best shot, and it may hurt. It seems to me that the father of your child may actually be around often because he wants to provide a healthy upbringing for your child. But you aren’t seeing it this way. Instead, you think he’s there for you.

He isn’t.

He has a girlfriend. He says he doesn’t have feelings for you. What else can he do to make it clear that he’s moved on without tarnishing your relationship and, in turn, hurting his relationship with his child?

That’s what makes the situation complicated and why he’s treading carefully. He wants you in his life; you are the mother of his child. He tells you things because he is building a healthy report with you, the mother of his child…who has custody…who controls when he sees his child…who can take it all away. Do you see how this can get ugly fast?

I know this is hard to hear and I also realize he may be leading you on by spending time with you and your child as a “family.” So, tell him that he needs to have one-on-one time with your child. As much as it may hurt, you need to set boundaries so you don’t try to sneak your way back into his arms…or his bed.

Also, it is obvious you want this time together because you want to win him back. Thing is you can’t make someone want you or want to be with you. You can’t win someone back if they weren’t your prize to begin with.

So, move on. Set boundaries so your child still has a relationship with his father without hurting you in the process. As much as you want to be with him this is not what he wants. Take his word for it and continue doing what’s best for your child.

Love strongly and wisely,

Sujeiry

DISCLAIMER: The advice offered by Sujeiry Gonzalez are solely the opinion of Sujeiry Gonzalez and should not be considered as a form of therapy and/or diagnosis or treatment of any kind. If counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.

[contact-form-7 404 "Not Found"]

Continue Reading
Advertisement
You may also like...

Sujeiry is a natural storyteller, dynamic radio show host and the proud CEO of LoveSujeiry.com. She's been at this digital media and content creation game for 15 plus years and pours her heart and soul onto LoveSujeiry.com - the only site for Latinas on all things love. After realizing there was a void in the love/relationship Latina media market, she took matters into her own hands and became the go-to sex and relationship expert on Latinx platforms. The former sex and relationship expert on Latina.com works diligently and passionately to encourage women of color to be their authentic selves as they navigate all things love.

Comments

More in Advice

Advertisement

Get Love In Your Inbox

Sign up for the Love Sujeiry newsletter and receive a free chapter of Dating RITE. Plus, stay in the know on all things love, including videos, articles, merch and events.
Email address
Secure and Spam free...

Trending

Facebook

Contributors

Podcast

Instagram

  • A special loving shout out to milagrosdesign who is one
  • The typical motherdaughter Latina relationship is one full of love
  • Behind the scenes of the TakeBackLatina photo shoot! Still happening
  • It isnt easy to start over It isnt easy to
  • This Saturday and throughout HispanicHeritageMonth we are TakingBackLatina We are
  • I mean whos got time for BS? Especially not when
  • I met kyrzayda at an event two years ago and
  • Im aging yo I see fine lines underneath my eyes

Love Bytes

To Top