DECEMBER 16 – FRIENDSHIP: How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?
I don’t think any one friend changed my perspective this year. If this question would have been asked 2-3 years ago then definitely. My perspective is pretty solid right now, and when I do waver I manage to come back to center and refocus.
DECEMBER 17 – LESSON LEARNED: What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?
I learned that I am terrified to live the life that I say I want to live. It seems strange, I know, but every time I am close to accomplishing a goal that brings the images of my vision board to life, I panic. I find myself trying to catch my breathe, experiencing a full blown anxiety attack. I become frustrated with myself because who in the world breaks down when they are fulfilled?! I do. Because a doubt remains in my mind that I am unworthy of happiness, unworthy of success and love. Only thing I can do, which I have been doing all year, is remind myself that I deserve everything and more. Surround myself and open my heart to those who reassure me, appreciate me, and cherish my presence. Distance myself from those who feel the opposite so I can break the cycle of self-sabotage. I am a work in progress and the work will continue on in 2011.
DECEMBER 18 – TRY: What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it?
I want to try tons in 2011! I have had a list of the 32 things I want to do at 32 and will finish off before my 33rd birthday on April 16th, 2011. On my list, there are sewing and or knitting classes, belly dancing classes, and attaining my drivers license. This year I’ve tried some things off my list that are less material. I tried being much more positive and focused, as well as growing my circle of loyal friends. I tried writing every day and writing a book (both still in full affect!). I tried promoting myself and being an artist first, manger/CEO second (still working on balancing the two!).
How did I feel when accomplishing my goals and trying new things? Powerful and alive. It comes to show that we can live the life we set out for ourselves. With a lot of focus, resilience, and humor, life can be as pretty as my pepa!™!!