In high school, I was a member of a spirit squad called SLAM. Phillips Academy Andover didn’t believe in cheerleading; cute girls flaunting their cuteness with their pom pomps goes against the schools message of Non Sibi (not for self). So SLAM was born instead.
The majority of our routines weren’t made of fluff. Girls didn’t twirl in the air or throw high kicks, exposing panties. SLAM members stomped rhythmically atop of the gymnasium floor. We encouraged team players to be aggressive, be, be, aggressive, while rolling our necks and wagging our fingers and clapping our hands like the best stepping squad this side of Harlem.
Only we were brainiac prep school students living in hoity toity Andover.
Still, “being aggressive” was instilled within the players and the SLAM squad, including myself. My Aries nature alone provides a natural, goal setting intensity that’s hard to shake. When I want something, or someone, I go for it. Whether it’s a high school crush ( I did ask John Mailer, son of Norman Mailer, out to the Sadie Hawkins Dance) or a career move like self-publishing Love Trips, I am aggressive. I do what I have to do to make contact, connect, and reach my goal.
This was my mentality when returning from my sister’s wedding, where I was a shy twerp with Paco. I didn’t know where we stood and that led us nowhere. Even though Paco sexed someone else at the wedding, I was still interested. Surprising, I know. Let’s call it maturity. So, I was pleasantly surprised when a little birdie told me that Paco was indeed “feeling me.”
“I heard it from the horses mouth,” the messenger said.
That was all I needed to be aggressive, be, be aggressive. That and Facebook chat.
Paco was on. I decided to bring up his “feeling me” without embarrassing him. I mentioned that I sensed him checking me out during the wedding weekend. He admitted to it. I said something about our sex tweets and he agreed that our sessions were pretty steamy. The conversation then took a turn. I admitted I wanted to be treated like a lady and that a man has never bought me flowers.
“Well, maybe you need to step outside the box. Shake it up a bit. Go for something you would never go for,” Paco replied.
I paused, considering my reply. It was the perfect opportunity to be bold; leap into the sky and show my panties.
“Like a Filipino from Vegas? That’s pretty outside the box for me,” I typed.
Boom. There it was. A sure sign that I was interested. But was he?
“There you go. Now you’re thinking,” he responded.
That was the reassurance that I needed. I could go for it.
“Since we are thinking outside the box,” I typed. “How about getting of Twitter and FB sometimes and having a real conversation?”
This was it. The moment where aggression is tested. Was it too much? Was I too forward or intense? All natural qualities of this Aries that sometimes backfire. I never did go to the Sadie Hawkins Dance with John Mailer. But, Paco, well, he was different. Though I rolled my neck and wagged my finger like a homegirl from Harlem, he seemed to like me.
The next day he made contact.