Building My Web, Building My Faith: A Dream Leads To Reflection
A few days ago, I had a very vivid dream. In the dream, I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, when 5 baby spiders appeared. They began spinning their webs. Each spun an individual web to crawl on and utilize for capturing their prey. I was amazed by their masterpieces.
I was also impressed by their tenacity, their ability to work together without interfering as they made their way. Then, the spiders came closer; their webs inches from my face. I shot up, dodging the sticky, silk substance and decided to kill the spiders before they encased my bed.
I remember picking up the RAID. I sprayed all over the ceiling, all over the bed, until the spiders shriveled, dead, and their webs vanished. Suddenly, a huge spider, covered in black and yellow stripes, jumped at my neck. It attacked. This bumble bee looking spider was fighting for her kin.
I awoke from the dream, conflicted. I knew there was a deeper meaning, and so I decided to look it up in the Dream Moods Dictionary. As per the website, this is what the elements of my dream symbolize:
“To see a spider spinning a web in your dream, signifies that you will be rewarded for your hard work. You will be promoted in your job or recognized for your achievement in a difficult task. Spiders are also a symbol of creativity due to the intricate webs they spin….Alternatively, if a spider is spinning a web in your dream, then it could be a metaphor for the world wide web and global communication.”
I found this very timely. So many positive things are happening in my life, so many opportunities have arisen from my hard work, creativity, diligence, and collaborating with women, especially due to social media and LoveSujeiry.com. Still, I tend to sabotage myself. Killing the spiders, which were positive signs, instead of embracing the blessings they were there to provide. Sometimes I am afraid that this life, these dreams, will not pan out and that I will not succeed. Everyone has fears. It is normal. But I have yet to fully retrain my mind to believe I will succeed as my own boss.
Case in point: my day job. Often I complain about my work but stick with it because I promised myself that, once I leave this job, it is for good. I will not work for anyone else. I will establish my business and never go back to a 9-5 where I have no control or creativity. Yet, simultaneously, I search for other jobs and work on my resume. That only means one thing. I still have to work on believing in myself 100%. This dream was a wake up call. I am the only one standing in the way. Now, whenever I feel myself lacking motivation or faith, I think of those spiders, spinning their webs, creating a strong foundation to build a home life. I am following their lead, building positive relationships and business partnerships that will benefit all involved, without interference or sabotage. I must create and plow ahead, even when I have doubts. If I don’t I will always sabotage myself, killing spiders along the way.