I’ve never felt ashamed of my body. Besides my small tits, I like what I see in the mirror, and my breasts look a lot plumper after having Evan. I don’t even mind my C-section scar. It’s like a badge of honor. After 20 hours of labor, I deserve some praise.
I’m also not a shy person. I talk about sex and relationships openly and unapologetically. I once said vagina a dozen times on my SiriusXM show. I can outdrink a pirate and still have the urge to drop it like it’s hot atop a table. Yet I don’t feel comfortable being naked in front of people. I even cover myself up in front of my momma – and she saw me in my birthday suit at birth.
My discomfort with being in the buff stems from Catholic guilt and the messages I received growing up. “Be a ‘good girl,’ Sujeiry,” Mami told me. “Close your legs because men don’t respect fast girls,” my Tia scolded. So I’ve spent the last 38 years covering up, fearing judgment and believing that doing otherwise is dirty.
This suddenly changed during my fiancé, Dave’s, 40th birthday weekend. On January 21st, 2016 I was thrust into an environment where anything goes – Desire Riviera Maya, a couples-only resorts for nudists and swingers. Dave was thrilled; he’s a fan of lost inhibitions, specifically mine. And I lost them, all right. At Desire Riviera Maya, I did something I never thought I would do, something I once judged others for – I stripped down and bared all.
I swam in a heated pool, lay out on the beach and had full conversations with nudists and swingers all while booty buck naked.
Why the sudden openness? Desire Riviera Maya’s ambience gave me permission to be freer than I’ve ever been and ever thought I could be. Aside from the four restaurants, Desire Riviera Maya allows adults to frolic naked. The hotel even has designated areas where anything goes – and by anything, I mean everything. If you want to have sex with fellow guests, just go to the jacuzzi or the disco. You can fool around out in the open, if you wish.
That’s why I let go of my inhibitions and was freed from my ‘good girl’ complex. No one is there to judge anyone’s choices, body type or body parts. No one is guilting you into hooking up or making you feel guilty if you do decide to have an orgy in the jacuzzi. No one boxes you in or expects you to behave because you are a woman. And no one batted an eye when Tampa Rachel joined me and Dave in our private pool – all naked. Or when Mr. Oklahoma and his much younger girlfriend jumped in soon after – also naked. Instead, guests wanted to know much more about the Latin couple in the sexy, VIP sweet.
And although Dave and I didn’t swap spit with any other couple, no one would think less of us – me – if we wanted to.
So I went there. At Desire Riviera Maya, I bared all and just…let…go. I released the guilt, societal double standards, and pressure to be a ‘good girl.’ I went nude and embraced every inch of me – C-section scars, Cellulite, and all – and carry this experience like a badge of honor.