Love Trends

Singlehood In NYC: It’s Nothing Like Sex and The City

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Single and PartyingCarrie Bradshaw was fabulous. She teetered in her Manolo Blahniks so gracefully; you’d never imagine she had bunions or sore toes.

That was the beauty of Sex and the City. Every Sunday, women sat in front of television screens, wishing they could live in the fabulosity of New York City. Most of us wanted to be Carrie, or at least have friends who were available for brunch every week. Sex and the City was our escape. All the men. All the fancy dinners and club hopping at Bed and nightclubs that only allowed you in if you had a key. We related to Carrie’s heartbreak and cheating and obsession with Mr. Big.

And how we all wanted our very own Mr. Big.

Thing is being single in New York City is nothing like Sex and the City. Just ask all the single women in there 30’s how they feel about dating in the Big Apple. They’ll stick out their tongues in disgust, roll their eyes in exasperation and babble about how difficult it is to find “the one” in a city where many are looking for a night of fun. We saw this with Samantha. She was the epitome of sexy romps. She desired flings and meaningless sex. Though we later learned that she had shunned commitment due to her fear of commitment. Samantha, like many of us, feared to be hurt and abandoned. And so she did what many women in NYC do when single and refusing to feel alone and desperate. She became indifferent.

Then there is the competition between women. According to Patti Stanger from Millionaire Matchmaker, there are five single women for every one single man in New York City. Yet we didn’t see these awful odds in Sex and the City. On the contrary, there seemed to be a surplus of men. Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda were always sleeping with or dating someone new. The only reference to a competition between women regarded models and men who are Modelizers. What man wouldn’t be attracted to a model in any city?

So, Sex and the City seems to have failed the women of New York City. Sure, every Sunday women watched, rooting for Carrie to reconnect with Mr. Big. Every Sunday, women related to the heartbreak, messy relationships and sloppy sexual encounters. But there was nothing real about the depiction of being single and looking in our 30s. Just look around at the single women you know who are still waiting for their Mr. Big.

Love Sujeiry is an aspirational lifestyle brand for Latinas and women of color that champions authenticity and manifestation. The owner and founder, Sujeiry Gonzalez, is the host of “Love Sujeiry: Dish Served Raw" on reVolver Podcasts. Previously, she hosted a show on SiriusXM in NYC and Exitos 93.9FM in Los Angeles. The content creator has also been featured on Latina.com, YourTango, Cosmo, Momstatic, Mommynoire, NBC Latino as she inspires women to dish on love, sex, and relationships, and to be their best selves. Sujeiry tells it like it is and shares her triumphs, devastating blows, tales of new mami life, and her creative career moves on her web series, "Love Bytes with Sujeiry," where she is authentically herself and holds nothing back. Ultimately, Love Sujeiry serves to entertain and inspire women to live authentically, find fulfillment through manifestation, love themselves, follow their passions and never ever settle.