Dating Story

My Love/Hate Relationship with Dating Poseur White Guys

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I am really physically attracted to white guys. Unfortunately, once they open their mouths my love quickly turns to hate. I’m talking about the bro who calls you “Dude” and takes a pic of your ass to share on Snapchat without your permission. Or the frat guy who lives in sandals and tank tops, suffocating you with his Axe body spray while he asks, “Do you like to party?!” Let’s not forget the white guy who assumes the only way to impress a Latina is to greet her with a, “Hola muchacha! Arriba! Arriba!” Ugh.

Still, I find myself dating and drawn to white guys. He won’t be as irritating and ignorant as the ones I mentioned. And he definitely won’t be the Down White Guy as he may just be the worst.

PLUS: I’m a Persian Peruvian Who Dates White Guys

You know the Down White Guy. He attends country music concerts but also listens to NWA because their music “speaks to him.” His parents pay for his trips abroad yet he shares self-suffering quotes on social media. My favorite is when the Down White Guy takes selfies and quotes a poet/writer of color then shares an anti-immigration post all in the same day.

These guys try so hard to be down, but because of their whiteness, simply cannot be down.

Like this white guy I dated who loved faux hiking. That is, he would walk around a path, find a nice view, and take a selife with the view behind him. He would then use the selfie as a profile picture and add a quote from a Kendrick Lamar song. “Do you know where your quote on Facebook came from?” I asked him one day. He replied, “No, but I found it interesting.” Really? I am so glad Kendrick Lamar spoke to your rich, white ass. Stupid boy.

MORE: Dating Los Latinos Vs White Guys: What’s the Difference?

So I ask, are all white guys this clueless and ignorant to the world around them? It’s annoying when they start out sweet, but their ignorance to the importance of Kendrick Lamar, multiculturalism and race go over their heads. Or gender equality has no space in their brains. Yet I hold out hope to meet the white guy of my dreams one day. I hope to go against the grain and forge my own path instead of ending up with a Persian or Peruvian man like the women in my family. I hope to marry a white guy who is kind, aware of the world around him, and who honors my heritage. One that doesn’t try too hard and won’t push me to yell profanities at the top of my lungs.

Ashley is a California-based writer with a love for pop culture and all things nature. When she isn't soaking up the California sun, she's writing and working on her newest creative endeavor. A self-proclaimed introvert, she writes about loving yourself as a woman, finding the right person to love all aspects you, and how to cherish all the love that is received from friends and family.