Dear Sujeiry,

A year ago, I became friends with a man. He was in love with another girl and they were actually broken up but he still loved her. I helped him get over her and he fell in love with me. When he told me, I wasn’t in love with him though I enjoyed talking to him. Sometimes I felt that I did love him but other times I didn’t. So I told him I didn’t love him. He said I was his last hope for love. That’s it’s me or no one.

This all happened last April and now I REALLY REALLY LOVE HIM. I feel that it’s something real and I regret losing the chance to be with him! I pushed him away but he is still in my life. I am sure he will never tell me he loves me again. He has a lot of pride. And I won’t tell him how I feel or even ask. Also, one of his friends asked him if he does still love me and he he said no. But I don’t believe it. Something inside me tells me that he still loves. His actions say so!

For example, when I wake up every morning, I have to text him good morning or he gets very mad. Is that a sign that he still loves me? One of my friends tell me, “Yes, he does still love you! Don’t you see how he looks at you and how jealous he is when you talk to other guys?!”

Do you think he loves me or not? Thank you for trying to help :-/

Sincerely,

Unrequited Love?

Dear Unrequited Love,

The only way to know if he still loves you is to ask! Assuming or asking for others opinions really isn’t going to clarify things. Your friends can’t guess how he feels. I can’t guess how he feels. Only he can tell you the truth!

Now, I know that asking, “Do you still love me?” is terrifying. What if he doesn’t? What it he does but doesn’t want to give it another shot? This happened to me once before. When I was in college I dated a man briefly but chose to end things with him because I was infatuated with someone else. We remained friends and soon I realized that I still had feelings for him. I dropped hints, like you probably do. I asked my friends and his friends, like you already are. They all encouraged me to speak up. So, I stopped being a coward and I did! Turns out he still had feelings for me as well but he didn’t trust me. He was afraid I’d hurt him again. So he rejected me because of it.

Your situation may turn out differently or it may turn out just the same. You will never know until you speak to him about how you feel. All you can do is be honest and hope for the best. And remember, it’s better to know than to live your life questioning this relationship. No more what ifs!

Love strongly and wisely,

Sujeiry

DISCLAIMER: The advice offered by Sujeiry Gonzalez are solely the opinion of Sujeiry Gonzalez and should not be considered as a form of diagnosis or treatment of any kind. 

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