When I was a little girl I dreamt of a large, winter-wonderland themed wedding. I even imagined there’d be an ice-skating rink and figure skaters triple axeling all over that ice. I wished for snowfall and diamonds. Hell, I wanted to look like Cinderella herself! Glass slippers and all.
Over the top? Yes. Especially when I fast forward to my adulthood where I barely want a traditional wedding at all. I don’t want a huge rock on my finger. I hardly wear jewelry, and when I do, it is a really simple design and small in size. And forget about the puffy princess dress. I want a fitted lace dress…that might not even be white. Besides, for the last few years, I’ve attended several family weddings and I’ve noticed one thing: weddings are for the pleasure of guests, not the bride and groom.
At every wedding people complained about the music, the food, and even the bride’s dress. Just a bunch of chismosos y chismosas gathered in cliques doing what they do best – bochinchar!
And when uninvited guests find out how “terrible” the wedding really was, they spread the hate. They weren’t even there!
It’s a lose-lose situation, you can’t please everyone. This is exactly why I want a super small wedding in an intimate setting; or I may prefer getting married at the courthouse and just have a small party with close friends and relatives shortly after. I’m sure it will disappoint many of my friends and family, but I could care less. It’s my (and my groom’s) special day – not theirs!
So, yes, that little girl is no longer researching ice skaters to book for her wedding. I want my wedding day to be perfect for me and my husband to be. Thing is my boo wants a huge wedding. He wants all his family members present and all of mine as well. He wants platters of Dominican food and soul food to represent both our cultures. Everything that screams traditional. And because of that we have to compromise. Still, I don’t want to spend the entire time worrying about my guests and how they feel. I don’t want to hear slick comments about how Jose is wearing jeans (how dare he?!) or how much weight Maria has gained.