I first laid eyes on Paul Walker on the big screen of what I thought to be the worst movie ever produced. I rolled my eyes at every flatly delivered line and gagged whenever Vin Diesel “acted” tough and flexed his muscles. Paul Walker was the only reason I didn’t walk out of The Fast and the Furious and demand a refund (minus the popcorn). Cause Paul Walker is as scrumptious as movie theater popcorn with extra butter.
His acting abilities are sub-par, but I just can’t stay away. Always resourceful, I watched every sequel on mute and on cable or online. I may be in love with Paul Walker but I rather save my chelitos for my flight to Los Angeles where I will find him, get down on one knee and propose we make sweet love.
I’m so damn romantic.
So, Paul Walker, I grant you the honor of 1st Lady of Love Hot Hombre of the Week, because of the following:
- You look so sexy when acting while muted.
- I want to rub my cheeks on your rugged beard.
- You’re dirty blonde hair makes me think dirty thoughts, like, are you dirty down there?
- Your piercing blue eyes make my pepa™ squeal, especially when you’re muted.
- We would have beautiful children together, Paul.
If you need any more convincing, here is a photo of Paul at his best:
He makes me love grass. And I hate grass.
And another one (please ignore the baldy to his right):
I hope to see your beautiful, chiseled jaw and flowing hair soon, Paul Walker. Hopefully, not on the big screen but on the LAX tarmac. I will bring the mute button and you bring the popcorn. Extra butter please.
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