Do you remember the game M.A.S.H? It was only the hottest game in the school cafeteria. Popular amongst teenage girls, the game “predicted” the future through luck and the process of elimination. Players wrote a list under the assigned categories (your future husband’s name, number of children, and the car you’ll drive, to name a few). You’d choose a number and your playmate counted each item off your list until only one item left under each category. If you were lucky, you got your dream man, job and home. If not, you’re living in a shack!
M.A.S.H may just be the first relationship quiz invented. Before young girls were of legal drinking age, they imagined what kind of relationship would fulfill them. Lucky for us, we no longer have to count on the luck of a pencil. Now, we are grown women who can simply ask ourselves the necessary questions about the man we like or love, and the relationship with are in. Here are some questions you should candidly ask yourself or your man about your relationship.
Do I feel that he is the one?
If you’re still not sure if he’s the one for you, take note on what your conversations are like and how you feel when you are around him. Can you be your true self around him? Does he accept you as is? Do you accept him or do you want to change him? The answers to these questions will tune you into how important this man and relationship is to you, and whether you feel he is “it.”
Are we compatible?
Take it from me: compatibility is key in relationships. If you do not have things in common, spending time together will be a chore. Soon, your relationship will be less about who you are at your core and more about getting freaky. And that won’t last! Talk to your partner about what he likes to do, what music he likes and his hobbies.
Do we have the same core values?
Compatibility is one thing, but having similar core values is even more important than enjoying a night of salsa dancing together. When talking to your man, ask him how he wants to raise children (if he wants children!), where he wants to live and settle down, is he religious, how important is spending time with family, and even whether he is culturally aware and open to all races and lifestyles. This will clue you in to the kind to life you will have with him if he ends up being your “one.”
How is your relationship with money?
Money makes the world go round and how you and you’re man spend it and save it will impact how you live your life as a couple. Ask him how he feels about spending, whether he has a checking or savings account, or what his plans are for retirement. You don’t need to know what he has in the bank (yet) but knowing his relationship with money will clue you in on whether you are financially compatible.
How important is sex?
It’s easy to assume that sex is important to you and your man, but not everyone wants sex the same way, or even the same amount of times per week (or per day.) You should ask your man what he likes in bed, when he wants it most, and even how often he needs sex. That’s when you know that you are equally fulfilling each other sexually.
No matter what you desire romantically you must communicate. Stop playing games, ask questions, and have an open dialogue with your man and yourself about it all.