That’s what the receptionist instructed when I called to book my Bitweeny for Monday, May 23rd, 2011. Today is that day and my pepa™ is already clenching with fear. But there’s no turning back. My credit card will be charged as I didn’t cancel within twenty four hours.
Presently, it is T-2 hours until Hairlessgate.
So here I am, counting down to the death of my pelitos. Panicking at the risk of ingrown hairs or worse – herpes! Alas, the appointment has been made and the clock is ticking. To minimize the pain, anxiety, and the embarrassment of having Svetlana’s face up in my pepa™, I did a little bit of research. With that said, here is what to do pre-waxing.
- Don’t shave at least 3 weeks before your first appointment.
- Take 1-2 ibuprofen or aspirins one hour before the waxing appointment.
- Don’t walk in and take off your panties as if you’re on a hot date. Wait until Svetlana wines and dines you. No. Just wait till she tells you to drop them.
- Wear a pair of comfortable grandmama panties to ease the pain after the waxing experience. If you wear a bikini, they may also ask you to keep your undies on when they wax your pepa™.
- Wear a pair of comfortable pants in case you feel a burn. Cotton tights work well. Don’t wear skinny jeans as if going to a club. A skirt also helps. When walking down the street, freshly waxed, you can get a little breeze in your pepa area!
- Play a motivational and empowering song. Sing it to your pepa to give her strength and moral support.
That’s all folks! Those are all the tips I found (and made up), which makes sense as there seems to be no real preparation for getting your hair yanked out from your vagina. And with that said it is 12:30pm. Time for my pepa to meet Svetlana.