Being of mixed blood feels like being rich. I have so many great traditions to follow, a large family to love and laugh with, and relatives that pass down words of wisdom from past experiences. I also deal with competing sides of the family who want me to be more like them. Some of my Persian relatives would love to see me settle down with a great Persian man while my Peruvian relatives are hunting for my Peruvian husband as I type. But all of their hard work, convincing me to settle down with a man from their culture, will go to waste. I have no plans whatsoever to marry, or even date, a Persian or Peruvian man.
I’m a Persian Peruvian gal who is into white guys.
And my relationship status always comes up during family gatherings. When we get together, each side pitches me their case. This is why you should marry that great Persian boy from the local university! Or, that Peruvian business man from South America will make a great husband! I’m used to it, but during Thanksgiving 2014 I decided to be honest and released a bombshell.
Sitting in my grandparent’s living room, waiting for our Thanksgiving feast to be declared ready, I spoke to my Persian aunts about my upcoming graduation and my uncertain post grad plans.
“So this whole time, you haven’t found a good boy?” one asked.
“Sadly, no. But there are lots of fish in the sea,” I replied.
“There are lots of Persian boys at your university. You don’t want to date any of them?” the other aunt pried.
“I prefer American boys. And American boys take time to mature.”
“Americans? Why would you date Americans?” Holy hell. It was as if I said I have sex with clowns dressed as monkeys.
I didn’t use the term “white guys” as that might have set the whole house on fire, but jeez, did my two aunts take my declaration to heart. They tried wrapping their heads around me liking American boys. My NOT wanting to marry a Persian man was enough to make me toxic.
Luckily, I was saved by dinner. While I slipped into a food coma, a Peruvian uncle came up to me, laughed, and said, “I heard you like American boys.” He was teasing, but in a mean way. Which was strange since he married a white woman. I laughed with him, trying to keep it light, and said, “You bet.”
Word has spread that Ashley likes white boys, yet each side of the family still pitches me their culture’s men. And I do feel conflicted. I am made of two very different cultures and was born in the United States. I feel it’s important to honor my ethnicity and my family, but it’s also important to be me. And I am a Persian Peruvian American that likes white guys. Sorry family, but you’ll be seeing some white grandchildren in the future.