It’s been months since you and your man ended your relationship. Yet you aren’t over him or the breakup. You still cry when you think of him. You aren’t interested in dating. And you’ve banned your friends from uttering his name.
It’s okay to mourn the loss of a love, but you can’t stay in a slump forever. It’s time to put away the ice cream, take off your PJ’s, and stop listening to “your song” on repeat. Here’s how to finally get over a broken heart.
Give yourself time to mourn. I know: I just told you to get over it! And you should…when you are ready. However, if it’s only been weeks since your breakup, you’re supposed to mourn the loss. Take some time immediately after a breakup to watch romantic comedies and cry while drinking wine and munching on chocolates.
Set a time limit. You shouldn’t stay in this state for months. That’s why you must set a time limit to your self-imposed wallowing. Whatever that time is truly is up to you. Some women need a week. Others need a month. Just make sure that it’s not a year.
Reflect to move on. It’s necessary to reflect on your relationship before you move on. You should look at your mistakes and not only the error of his ways. If you fail to do this, you may relapse and repeat patterns and ineffective relationship habits. This will make it harder to move on.
Spend time with friends. Call your friends and talk about the breakup and your healing process. It’s always good to vent. Your girls should have your back and support you through this phase. Make sure that you get everything out! But also set a time limit on the ex-bashing. As sweet and dear as your friends may be, no one wants to spend months with a Debbie Downer.
Start having fun again. You’re feeling a lot better after talking to your friends. Then, one day, you really miss him. You feel a void. Well, you need to fill it!
I’m not talking about love. I suggest experiencing new things. Try a new hobby. Start an exercise regimen. Read more books. It’s about finding new ways to remain in a positive headspace. Personally, focusing on work really helps. By realizing how capable you are without a man, you accomplish a lot more.
Prevent a future relapse. That means taking drastic measures to stay away from your ex. This includes deleting his number, text messages, or anything else that may tempt you to contact him. If he was especially toxic, purge him from your life. That includes social media.
Understand that this is a process. You may not see immediate results, so you must remain strong and persevere. Just remember: you are beautiful and special. There is much to be grateful for. You don’t need to mope around because of a man. Hold your head up high and move on. Soon enough you will forge ahead and forget about What’s His Name.
Tell us. What’s the worst thing a woman can do after a breakup?