You have a crush. He’s handsome, holds great conversation, and seems to have everything together, but you’re scared to let him know how you feel.
“He’s too attractive to ever want to be with a girl like me,” you think. It’s this mindset that holds many women back.
Too many of us are afraid to expand our horizons. We are hesitant to pursue someone who is out of their league. The reality of it all is that “leagues” don’t actually exist.
Society makes “dating within your league” a big deal. It’s a social construct that limits people’s dating pools. 25-year-old Nicholas Hamilton from Queens, New York said, “I don’t believe in boundaries because they put people in a box and causes them to miss out on too much.” If you let society limit who you can or can’t pursue, you may miss out on a shot at love. Or, as 21-year-old Kwamena Amissah from Baltimore, Maryland added, “a nerd dating a cheerleader just doesn’t fit right in the minds of society, but love shouldn’t be predicted off the views of society but the individual.”
When someone is out of your league, it’s likely implied that they are more attractive. However, personality is everything. Use your confidence and charm to draw a man in. 21-year-old Amissah went on to say, “if the vibe, personality and attraction match, there is no such thing as out of my league.” And he’s exactly right. There should be less emphasis on looks and material possessions, and more focus on compatibility.
Don’t be afraid to go after what you want. If you are attracted to someone that is considered “out of your league,” know that society won’t cuddle with you on lonely nights. Instead of daydreaming about your dream guy that you’re too scared to approach, push yourself to get out of your comfort zone. The worst that can happen is a ‘no,’ but that’s better than never trying at all.
Tonya Nelson is an ambitious hopeless romantic. As a graduating senior at Howard University, Tonya uses her experiences to share her ideas about love and romance from a collegiate perspective. Her plans are to become a multimedia mogul. Until then, she’s working on her college degree while indulging in casual dating along the way.
Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.