A few years ago I dated Mr. Indecisive. After three months, I realized I didn’t really know where we stood romantically. We saw each other regularly, but were we in a relationship? Or, were we just casually hooking up? I had no idea. We never discussed it. So, one night while spending the night at his place I figured it would be a good time to ask.
“What are we?” I asked. Silence. It’s like I dropped a bomb. We lied still. His heartbeat quickened.
“Uh, what do you think we are?” he finally spoke up.
“I don’t know, that’s why I asked you.” I shrugged. Then asked him the same question again. And again. And again.
“We’re…uh…I don’t know…uh…dating, I guess?” Mr. Indecisive responded with clear hesitation.
It was like pulling teeth so I didn’t feel assured at all. I realized we were keeping it casual and that he didn’t want a relationship. I needed to accept that or end things completely.
The following night my friends and I went out to a bar and met a couple of guys. One of them was the cutest guy I’ve ever seen, I’m not exaggerating. And he decided to talk to me! He had big eyes and a warm smile. He was so sweet and funny. I liked everything about him and I wanted to get to know him.
After a few days of texting and calling, New Guy asked me out to dinner. We had an amazing first date and I was head over heels. As for Mr. Indecisive, I had been ignoring his calls. I wanted to forget about him and focus on New Guy. But, one day I figured that wasn’t the right thing to do; I decided to pick up Mr.Indecisive’s call so we could have “the talk.”
“Hey! How’s my girl doing? My friend Robbie and his girlfriend want to go out on a double date,” he said.
Double date? What? I didn’t think any of his friends knew I existed, I thought.
“Why do they want to go on a double date with us?” I asked.
“Haha, why wouldn’t they? You’re my girlfriend, after all. They’re excited to meet you!” Mr. Indecisive replied.
Since when were we in a relationship? I thought. When we had the initial “talk” I definitely didn’t count his half-assed answers as defining our relationship. We were never official. And he had to know. I decided to be decisive and cut things off with Mr. Indecisive, and happily continued dating New Guy. Mr. Indecisive never completely understood why, but here’s a clue: he didn’t take me seriously so, uh, bye.