Girl meets boy. Girl gets boy. Girl learns boy is…bisexual.
It’s completely out of left field, but these days being sexually fluid is much more common, especially among millennials. While sexual identity and orientation is still a hot topic, men and women are no longer sticking to just one sex. Some flirt, fuck, and finagle their way into full-blown relationships with both sexes, and it’s left many women with a new dating dilemma: can I date a bisexual man?
Anna, 22, of Jersey City can and does. “I love bi men!” she exclaimed. “ I don’t really understand why socially women who are bi are considered hot while bi men are considered to be gay or ‘confused,'” she added, “but personally, I would absolutely date a bi man. You can’t always judge a person by a stereotype, especially these days.”
While Anna is down for guys who bat for both teams, there are some women who aren’t keen to the idea, especially when it comes to sexual experimentation. “ I had a boyfriend that wanted me to penetrate him with a strap on,” Michelle, 35, of Brooklyn shared, “It was so uncomfortable for me.” In the end, her man was into it but she found it to be a complete turn off.
Jessica, 29, of Manhattan, reiterated that while she had never been with a bi guy she’d question whether she would be able to please him. “I think it would be hard for him to feel fully satisfied in a monogamous long-term relationship,” she said. “If he’s attracted to both men and women, then how can he be fully satisfied with just one or the other, exclusively?” Jessica’s questions are valid as men and women provide different things in a relationship.
“If you are a woman, it [may be] impossible to fulfill all of a bisexual man’s needs.”
Shaney, 26, of Queens, co-signed and stated that she wants a man that’s 100% attracted to her. She doesn’t want to wonder if he wants to be with a man. “Him thinking of another woman would sit better than him thinking of both a man and a woman.” That’s an understandable feeling. With the shortage of single men, many women don’t want to compete with both sexes for a guy. Still, there are some women who have managed to find love with their bisexual man, even when feelings of inadequacy or the threat of infidelity is still are a big concern.
“My husband is bi and so am I,” Julia, 35, of Newark expressed. “We have tons of extra fun in the bedroom because of this!” As for cheating when bisexual, Julia believes people assume the worst. “Being bisexual doesn’t affect your fidelity. We found each other, had two children and have been together for 5 years.”
In the end when you find the right person, sexual orientation doesn’t always matter. “I’m bi ,” said Jamie, 32, of Manhattan, “and [my relationship with my husband] is the same as any other. I chose my husband. Just like how a straight woman would choose to stay with just one person, I like both men and women but chose my husband as my one and only.”
So, if he loves you, is faithful and makes you happy, there’s no need to say bye just because he’s bi.